VOOR DE ZEKERHEID DAT ALLES GOED ZIT (2022)

Secondhand doors, Dremel, Milling Machine, Gouges, Nails, Engraving Pen, Lead, Coffee, Video, Sound
About 250 x 250

TW S*xual Abuse

'Voor de Zekerheid dat Alles Goed Zit' is a very personal work. The work reflect on the recovery after sexual abuse. The focus lies on the new start; for me that meant a new house, new clothes, new furniture, but most importantly building up my spirit  again from scratch. Bit by bit I managed to get myself and my environment back together, yet I did not succeed at feeling at home in my own new room.

In my own room I could not be present, the only thing I could do was lie down on my bed and listening to music on my noise cancelling headphones. Whatever I tried, it did not work. It seemed an impossible task to feel comfortable in my own space. The attempts grew more sad and desperate, and so the work is about failing.

The work represents a sort of mental space, filled with bits and shreds of memories and intrusive thoughts. The room is build out of doors in which these shreds are permanently scratched and carved. Scratching is a small gesture yet at the same time destructive. It is quite a sad gesture actually, as if you or these shreds are aggressively claiming presence in the space, but not really succeeding at it.